by ALISON LEVIER Photographer/Videographer
2014 saw the release of many horrible movies, including the second-coming of the “Spiderman” sequel, a live-action “Hercules”, and another “Transformers” sequel featuring literally none of the cast from the first three “Transformers” movies. But perhaps the worst movie that was birthed in 2014 was the “Annie” remake.
Oscar-nominee Quevenshané Wallis stars as Annie, an orphan who wants nothing more than a family. I’ll stop there, however. If you do not know the plot of “Annie” by now, you cannot be helped.
“Annie” was originally a 1977 Broadway musical, then a 1983 film, then another 1999 film. The musical is a classic, loved by all; everybody wanted to make a buck on it, though, it seems.
The two films preceding the 2014 remake were charming, featuring a cute little girl singing cute little showtunes with the backdrop of New York City for her to be cute in front of. They sold well and pleased many families around the globe.
The 2014 remake did not.
This movie is quite possibly the worst movie I have ever seen in my whole life. I have never walked out of a movie before, but this was almost the first time, and it would have been the first time if I was not convinced to stay and see how it ended (she moves in with Warbucks, obviously) by our editor-in-chief (Jasmine Elshamy–I’m totally blaming her for this one).
Alas, I stayed and endured the last 40 minutes of one of the most horrid displays I have ever had the displeasure of seeing.
Now, let me first begin by saying that I am usually a fan of horrible movies. I find them charming and they are kind of a guilty pleasure, but this movie is simply unwatchable.
The girl who plays Annie cannot sing. They actually hired a little girl that could not sing to be the lead in a movie musical that has been made into a movie twice and been on Broadway three different times and been done millions of times by school and community theaters around the globe. The first step to them ruining this classic was hiring a girl who could not sing.
Now, do not get it twisted, literally none of the actors in this movie have any musical talent (including Jamie Foxx, I said it), so it is not just little Q who falls short in that front – it’s all of them.
Aside from the horrendous singing, the acting was awful, too. I don’t know if the director wanted Cameron Diaz to play Miss Hannigan in a completely over-the-top, romanticized and totally unrealistic way, but if he did, he got what he wanted. I have not seen acting that awful in my whole life. My whole life. It was absolutely appalling.
Another brilliant idea by the production staff was to modernize the classic story of the little orphan Annie, setting the scene in modern-day Harlem, and changing all the music so that it fit the hip-hop genre. My head hurts just thinking about it.
People who do not respect classics should not be making movies. There was absolutely nothing redeeming about this movie, and the fact that those who wrote this movie had no respect for the classic tale they were retelling just goes to show that they had no right to try and adapt it in the first place. Some things just are not meant to be changed, and this was one of those things.
Did you see “Annie”? If so, what did you think?